Monthly Archives: March, 2012

Ten Quick Questions

1. Give one of your favourite jokes.

What chord do you get when you drop a piano down a mine shaft?

A flat minor (it helps if you say it out loud).

2. Give another of your favourite jokes, based on the first.

What chord leads an army?

A major.

3. Name an upcoming thing on TV that you are indescribably excited about seeing.

The second part of The Big Bang Theory (Season 5) on E4 this Thursday.

4. Who’s your favourite Inbetweener?


5. If you get to spend an entire day doing one or two subjects what would they be?

History or Art.

6. Spots or Stripes?


7. Gorilla on Drums or Eyebrows?


8. Hard One: NAME YOUR FAVOURITE ADVERT (from last year)

Because of it’s insanely catchy song, the

9. Even Harder One: Name your favourite advert EVER.

Compare the! Simples!

10. What’s the square root of 169?


What are your answers? Please comment or put on your blog! ūüôā


The Inbetweeners

ANOTHER epic sitcom!

The Inbetweeners mainly comprises of four characters: Will (one word: Briefcase-******!), Simon (the victim of bad dressing in a School Cat Walk…), Neil (who became an atheist when he realised that “God” is “Dog” backwards) and Jay (Friend!). Each episode basically comprises of one or more of these hapless young adults falling victim to an ABSOLUTELY HUMILIATING event (which ranges from grassing on the entire (under-age) year during their annual trip to the pub, to the camping trip…).

The writers never run short of ideas, even after 21 episodes and a feature film. The characters are instantly loveable (although Jay not really so, for his constant showing off and lying can get on your nerves. But once you meet his Dad, you just really want to give Jay a big hug…Trust me: If you go into the toilet and Jay’s dad is there, GET OUT!!!!!! Not only is he a bully, but his Number Twos smell worse than a¬†stink-bomb, and his Number Threes are out of control), and just when you think you’ve seen the best episode…you see the next one!

The impossible task is trying to decide which of the Inbetweeners is your favourite. For me, it’s between Will and Neil. Will is the show’s glue, and is also the narrator. His sarcastic sense of humour just makes me smile every time, and his view on life and the world he’s living in is just…indescribable. He’s the victim in every single episode. But every time he just shakes his head, tuts, mutters sarcastically “Great!”, and then reveals his view on the day (when they say you learn from your mistakes, that especially applies to the poor inbetweeners!). Will can also eat bonsai trees. Without Will, the show would not exist. Fact.

But Neil is a close competitor because of his relentless optimism and happiness. Even if he’s been stung by a wasp in his fluffy costume (that you get at theme parks), his clothes have been burned, and he’s had to resort to wearing not the best selection of clothing around Thorpe Park, he just remembers that this is the only life he has, so he should make the most of it. So he’s never scared to overdo it with the fake tan, wear the most embarrassing suit EVER to the Christmas Prom, just have fun with his dancing (which is, come to think of it, the MAIN REASON as to why Neil is so BRILLIANT), or eat sausages raw.

But let’s not forget one of the most genius characters on the Inbetweeners: Mr “Rhod” Gilbert (NEVER call him Rhod, as Will found out the hard way). Gilbert is, thankfully, the complete opposite to every Head of Year in the whole of Britain. He hates grassing, he beats Will at sarcasm (as shown in the following quote, after commenting on the fact that new students should NOT wear a big circular badge saying, “Hi, My Name is ___”:¬†“Perhaps you’d like to mention it in the school debating society? Obviously, you’ll have to start one first(!)”), his motto is “Life isn’t fair”, and the word “motivation” is NOT in his dictionary (as shown by his leaving speech in the Inbetweeners Movie). I like Mr. Gilbert. But if he was my teacher…

Word has it that a fourth series will be coming soon, after the writers reported twice that a certain episode/film would be the Inbetweeners’ last appearance. I can’t wait.

FACT OF THE DAY:¬†Remember the drumming Gorilla? Remember the dancing eyebrows? Remember ANY Cadbury ad? I’m positive your answer to at least¬†one¬†of these is “Yes”. But how do you think the dancing eyebrows were made? CGI? Animatronics? Did the children actually do it for real? The answer to all of these are NO. The children were in fact treated like puppets. Yes. That’s right.¬†Puppets.¬†Well, technically, what happened was that puppet wire was attached to the skin above their eyebrows by sellotape, and two puppeteers stood behind them and “operated” them using the old wooden structures used in puppet shows. The puppeteers, string, tape etc were cut out in post-production. And was the balloon performance for real?¬†Yes it was!

Somethin’ Stupid

On Sunday, my bedroom lightbulb was the first lightbulb to go out since all the upstairs lights were replaced with energy-saving ones. That was because of my “annoying” habit of constantly leaving my bedroom light on whenever I leave, which my parents constantly point out (mainly because I constantly tell Dad to turn the tap off when he brushes his teeth (I just don’t see the point in it. I’m not an “Ecowarrior”), so Dad comments that If I’m so green, why don’t I do my bit and turn the light off when I leave).

So last Sunday, when it went out, Dad replaced it with a better one (but it was still energy-saving). But this bulb cost more electricity, so he told me to be EXTRA AWARE to turn the light off when I leave. Just to make sure I did, I wrote “TURN OFF when you leave please” on a Post-It, and stuck it under the light switch.

At first it went well. The first three times, I’d see the note, and do as it says.

That night I was downstairs, when Dad called from the landing, “What does it say on the Post-It?”


“What does it say on the Post-It?”

“Uh…(confused as to why he’s asking) ‘TURN OFF¬†when you leave¬†please’?”

“Well then, what’s the current status of your light?”


Crud with a cherry on top.

I was rightfully met by raucous laughter as I embarrassedly trudged upstairs.

They always say you forget things when you grow middle-aged.

I think that’s already happening. What a pleasant thought(!)

As an¬†after note, here’s something I realised today in English:

A “clicky” pen can create quite an effective rhythm for the Doctor Who Theme Tune!

Clickety-CLICK! Clickety-CLICK! Clickety-CLICK! Clickety-CLICK! (Ooo-oo-ooooooooooooo!!!!)

I love being a teenager (and a nerdy one at that)! ūüėÄ

The Muppets

#It’s time to play the music! It’s time to light the lights! It’s time to meet the Muppets on the Muppet Show tonight!#

As soon as the curtains on the Muppet stage theatre rise, the music starts, the Muppets appear, and this is sung, happiness and excitement spreads through my veins faster than blood. Who will the special guest be? Will Gonzo be in it? Will Scooter finally realise how unimportant he is? Will Fozzie Bear finally get a good sense of humour? What will Miss Piggy and Kermit do now? What will Animal do this time? Will Pigs in Space be back? Are the two old men finally going to get out of their box and perform with the Muppets? Will there be a new act that more than exceeds the Mah Na Mah Na song (of course not! It’s impossible)?

You never ever seen the Mah Na Mah Na song? Well then you have three choices: See it for free on Youtube (or listen to it for free on, buy The Muppets Original Soundtrack off iTunes (it features on it), or buy the Soundtrack in hmv etc.

Why? Because the Mah Na Mah Na song is GENIUS. The lyrics are gobbledygook; the puppets are highly inappropriate to the song, which makes it so amazing (the puppets include two pink, tall, fluffy aardvark-like creatures with absurdly huge eyelashes who can only say “Doo doo” and a¬†human-esque¬†thing¬†with long orange hair, purple skin and yellow sunglasses who can only say “mah na”), and the reactions and expressions made during the sketch just put you in stitches.

The song basically comprises of switching between the two fluffy aardvarks “doo-dooing” and the purple thing “mah na mah naing”, the “Mah Na Mah Na” thing doing an exaggerated, OTT “mah na mah na” solo, trailing off, stopping, looking crest fallen at the fluffy aardvarks, then reluctantly starting the “mah na mah na…doo doo…” thing again. The “Mah Na Mah Na” thing constantly tries his solo again and again, and each time he just trails off as he realises the pink aardvark things are shaking their heads at it, and becomes crest fallen again. This doesn’t happen repeatedly though; there are many twists in the performance. The sketch is NOT Noel-Fielding’s-Luxury-Comedy-mad. It’s lying-on-the-floor-laughing-so-hysterically-that-you’re-hiccoughing-and-struggling-to-breath-and-going-red-in-the-face funny.

The highlight of the Muppets’ career is the film that came out this year. It was hilarious (picture Swedish chef with a flamethrower, standing in front of a fridge full of rotten food. Guess what happens next), had great songs (as most musicals do), and had an exceptionally unexpected cameo from a certain character off the Big Bang Theory (as a human version of Walter: the latest addition to the Muppet cast).

One of the most funniest moments from the film is when Kermit, Walter, Walter’s human brother and Walter’s human brother’s girlfriend travel around the US and France, collecting members of the Muppets who have gone on to do different things. Gonzo has become a millionaire plumber; Scooter is part of Google; Dr Bunsen Honeydew and his poor assistant, Beaker, work for CERN; Fozzie Bear is a member of the Muppets’ rival, the Moopets; Miss Piggy works for Vogue; Animal is (believe or not) taking anger management classes, and the brown dog who plays the piano was found sleeping in a hammock in his garden (so he wasn’t added to the “montage”).

I’m not a Muppet geek. I just find them too funny for words. Swedish Chef and his¬†P√∂pc√łrn (video on YouTube). Animal and his drums (Drum! No drum! Drum! No drum! Drum! No drum!…). Pepe and his magic potato (from Cravendale’s EPIC ad). I adore the Muppets!

And for my last words, may I present to you the two old men from the theatre box!

I hope we get very well entertained tonight!

Oh. Sure we will! I brought a book!


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